#28

In junior high, I lived in Nashville: the South. As a result, we spent what felt like months studying the Civil War. I memorized battle dates (and then promptly forgot them), built dioramas, wrote special reports, learned about the great generals.

And yet, I never really understood what the Civil War was all about. Was I too young to understand the complexity of the reasons for the war? Yes. Was I too immature to even begin to fathom what it would be like to fight against your own brother? Yes. Was I too spoiled to begin to guess how exhausting it would be to march hundreds of miles? Yes. Was I too ignorant to guess at what our nation would be like today had the Union been demolished? Yes.

But, I'm an adult now. With a husband I love. A daughter I would die for. A country I love. And I am living in the belt buckle of the Civil War.

Last weekend, we went to Gettysburg National Military Park. Standing atop Little Round Top, I teared up. I felt an enormous sadness. A sadness for all the men: husbands, brothers, fathers, friends killed.

The week before our trip I read The Killer Angels by Michael Shaara. And for the first time I felt such empathy for both sides, I understood the different perspectives and I had such a strong respect for the soldiers who fought. (This is a lovely, very easy to read book. I was hesitant to start it because I've never been "into" the Civil War and thought all those reenactors were geeks. No more.)

We are now watching the movie "Gods and Generals" which is about the Battles of Manassas, Fredericksburg and Chancelorsville. There are more books to read, more battlefields to visit and more movies to watch. But I can finally say, friends, that I am beginning to appreciate the sacrifices that all those men (and women) made for us.

Oh yes, back to the subject. Gettysburg was phenomenal. We spent the day, could have spent the week. I wasn't too sure what we would find; it is a battlefield after all. How interesting could it be? Well, very. We followed the CD audio tour and enjoyed every moment.